IT News - Humor

Never Heard Of Him
ComputerWorld, June 16th, 2020
Oh, he's not a him? Never heard of her or them either.

"This pilot fish gets a meeting invite from his boss's boss with no information about what it's about - just the name Skip Level.

And fish, who doesn't know anyone by that name and is busy with customer-related work, declines, saying, 'If you would find out from Skip Level what they want and then send the ask along to me, or just have Skip Level contact me directly, that would be great.'

Which prompts his boss's boss to send out some much-needed clarification to everyone in the department..." - ComputerWorld

You have to admit, this was better than finding out the hard way

"Sysadmin pilot fish is checking out encryption for his company's backups.

'We have a mainframe that runs our core system,' explains fish. 'Each night we back up to an on-site tape and then make a copy of the tape to go off-site. Couriers shuttle the tape back and forth between the sites each day.'

The obvious place to apply encryption is to those off-site tapes, so fish decides to create an encrypted copy of a tape to show how well the process works..." - ComputerWorld

Probably a big chunk of a tree.

"It's the 1980s, and this pilot fish works in an accounting department, where he responds to company order to find ways to lower costs by submitting a request to stop printing six useless inventory reports. 'We always immediately tossed them into recycling, and it would save about 1,000 pages per month,' says fish.

The response comes back from IT: 'The inventory system is so poorly documented that it would cost more to shut down the print run than we could save.'

Request denied..." - ComputerWorld

Because IT doesn't know beans about counting beans

"This pilot fish at a catalog retailer doubles as Mac technical support guy and advertising project manager. 'The company had been bought out several years earlier, and most of the decisions were now being made by accountants a few hundred miles away,' he says.

One of those decisions is to extend the original three-year lease on first-generation Apple Power Mac G5s by several years. But, fish notes, these are heavy-use machines and are starting to break down..." - ComputerWorld

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